Smart Women

 SMART WOMEN

The Emperor hates and attacks

Smart women who question his facts.

He says they're all quite dim,

And publicly shames and reviles them

For having the brains that he lacks.

Daily Rants

 DAILY RANTS

The Emperor daily rants

Against the hated immigrants.

Unless they're young and pretty,

And just a bit dim-witty.

Then something happens in his pants.

Most Offensive Trait

 MOST OFFENSIVE TRAIT

The Emperor's energy comes from hate.

He thinks it's hate that makes him great.

It means he doesn't have a friend,

Only those who just pretend.

It is his most offensive trait.

Escape From Oz

 ESCAPE FROM OZ

The Emperor laughs at all the laws.

He breaks them all without pause.

Laws are only for his foes,

And none of them really knows

If there is any escape from Oz.

Home in a Hearse

 HOME IN A HEARSE

The Emperor is known to nurse

A grievance against the universe.

He says we're all so unfair,

So we'd better take care,

Or he might send us home in a hearse.

Also Buffoons

 ALSO BUFFOONS

The Emperor's goons

Are like a pack of baboons.

They're not only scum,

But exceedingly dumb,

Not only poltroons, but also buffoons.

A Bit Ick

 A BIT ICK

The Emperor was feeling a bit ick.

Physically or mentally, he was sick.

It could have been either way,

It was hard to say.

Perhaps it was just because he was a dick.

A Lick of Sense

 A LICK OF SENSE

The Emperor speaks so much nonsense,

None of it based on evidence.

But his minions believe his lies,

Rather than their eyes,

Because none of them has a lick of sense.

A Name of Shame

 A NAME OF SHAME

The Emperor's palace has a wall of fame.

All of them emperors, including his name.

Though all the names are in gilt,

It's a wall of guilt,

Ending with a name of shame.

The Great Dictator

 THE GREAT DICTATOR

The Emperor, also known as the Great Dictator,

Called everyone a traitor

Who was loath

To break his oath

To obey the law, rather than be a desecrator.

The Emperor's Lice

 THE EMPEROR'S LICE

The Emperor doesn't like to be nice.

That's why he likes ICE.

They're brutal and fascist

And rule with a fist.

They are the Emperor's lice.

The Widows Weep

 THE WIDOWS WEEP

Blood drips from the Emperor's hands

As he glad-hands killers from other lands.

The blood of their dead

Stains their hands just as red,

And the widows weep in their thousands.

His Autocracy

 HIS AUTOCRACY

The Emperor loves the aristocracy.

They are so much better than democracy.

Democracy says people

Are born free and equal.

It's the opposite of his autocracy.

Burn the Future

 BURN THE FUTURE

The Emperor has issued the command

That we burn the Homeland.

He wants to see the fire

Climb higher and higher,

As we burn the future into a wasteland.

For Marjorie

 FOR MARJORIE

The Emperor demands complete loyalty.

If you don't bow and pledge your fealty,

He will frown and cut you down.

Then, no matter your renown,

You will be just history.

The Kool-Aid

 THE KOOL-AID

So we know what to think

The Emperor gives us Kool-Aid to drink.

It tastes really bad,

And makes us all sad,

And later we all need a shrink.

Place the Blame

 PLACE THE BLAME

The Emperor loves his name.

Everything must proclaim his fame.

So, when everything goes bust,

And the coins and buildings turn to rust,

We will know where to place the blame.

Likes Them Young

 LIKES THEM YOUNG

They say the Emperor likes them young.

He lusts for them with drooling tongue. 

He says he gives them such a thrill

When he moves in for the kill,

But Stormy says he's not well hung.

The Sight of Gold

 THE SIGHT OF GOLD

The Emperor loves the sight of gold.

It covers the castle like mold.

It's all very wacky,

And makes him look tacky,

As this parvenu peasant we behold.

All Such Slimes

 ALL SUCH SLIMES

As in many other times,

The Emperor's minions committed crimes.

None were sorry,

None had to worry,

As the Emperor pardoned all such slimes.

His Pouffy Hair

 HIS POUFFY HAIR

The Emperor loves his pouffy hair.

He pretends he doesn't care,

But he carefully sprays it every day.

That doesn't mean to say he's gay,

It's just his private love affair.

Odious Freaks

 ODIOUS FREAKS

The castle has a rancid reek

Caused by the Emperor's cruel streak.

His minions don't care,

Because his cruelty they share,

Making each of them an odious freak.

The Beauty Queen

 THE BEAUTY QUEEN

The Emperor did strut and preen

Because he married a beauty queen.

The fact that she was also dense,

And didn't have a speck of sense,

Made her his perfect female dream.

The Lame

 THE LAME

In order to increase his fame,

The Emperor wanted a nickname.

He suggested "the Great,"

But he was filled with such hate,

That we just called him "the Lame."

A Capering Clown

 A CAPERING CLOWN

The Emperor wears his cruelty like a crown.

He thinks it brings him great renown.

But let the truth be told:

Before us we behold

A craven and capering clown.

Home to Hell

 HOME TO HELL

Everywhere the Emperor's minions fell.

It was the ringing of their death knell.

The tide was turning,

The people were coming,

To send him home to hell.

Pure Demoniac

 PURE DEMONIAC

The Emperor's hand is turning black.

It's much better than the zodiac

To show the world his true self:

A whiny whimpering wittle elf

With an inner soul that's pure demoniac.

His Puerile Pout

 HIS PUERILE POUT

Like a thug on the prowl,

The Emperor likes to scowl.

He thinks it makes him look so tough,

Though he's really just a puff,

And his puerile pout is just a howl.

No Wedding Ring

 NO WEDDING RING

The Emperor wears no wedding ring.

He couldn't find one with that bling

That he felt he quite deserved.

And the Empress he just unnerved

When he gave to her a golden G-string.